Every Single Woman's Battle

Chapter One: whose battle is it?

"Men and women struggle in different ways when it comes to sexual integrity." - Does our current culture truly recognize that both men and women struggle? When was the last time you heard anything about a woman's purity in the same regard that a man's purity is talked about?

Planting good Seeds:

1. How important is the Word of God to you? Why?

The Word of God is highly important to me. It is literally the Words of God being spoke into my life. It is the answer to everything I need. It is the foundation of a solid relationship with my Lord and Savior. It is truth. It is right. It is home. It shows how to love. It proves that God chastens the one's He loves. It is the ultimate love story with a storyline so compelling it is humbling - yet it is so hard for me to get sucked into the love story. It is the physical presence of God that I have in my life. It is a blessing, I own more than one version of something very few even today have at all, let alone in different versions and sizes. 

Galatians 6:8; James 1:14-15

2. What, if anything, in these verses feels like a threat or a warning to you? Why do you think you respond to the verses the way you do?

There is a strong warning in these verses for those that seek fleshly pleasure or pleasure that is selfish. The warning states that those that are selfish or those that are not seeking to please the Lord with their behavior will find destruction. James tells us that we will be tempted and enticed to follow our own selfish ways, but it will lead us down a path of destruction just as Galatians warned us of. 

I Corinthians 10:13

3. What does the promise of I Corinthians 10:13 mean to you?

There is no temptation that I will encounter that someone else (a woman) has not already encountered. While I can't let this be a reason to not respond to temptation I can allow it to be encouragement to me that others have fought this same battle or one similar and they to have made it through. The verse allows tells us God will not give more than we can bear. What is tricky about this is often we can handle more than we think we can, we need to remember that God won't give us more than we can bear. God is in control not us. So more than likely we will bear more than we think, because God has made us strong and sin has deceived us into thinking of ourselves as weak. But all of this should be remembered in the perspective that With God all things are possible and with Man nothing is possible.

Weeding Out Deception:

4. Do you agree with the statement that every woman fights the battle for sexual and emotional integrity? On what do you base your opinion?

Yes I do believe that every woman on some level does have to fight the battle for sexual and emotional integrity. We are surrounded by sexual content. While I would agree that a man’s struggle would seem more directed in physical appearance and a woman’s toward emotional ties. I believe that in our culture we opposite sexes flaunt this at each other. To some extent women realize that a man is tempted by appearance and she may dress a certain way to obtain that attention. Just as I believe men realize that woman are drawn by words. All this to say that with the Word of God and a serious heart to fight sexual sin I think that the battle of sexual sin in an individual’s life can be won and maintained.

5. The author warns that it is not wise to think that sexual immorality can’t happen to any one of us. How prevalent do you think sexual immorality is among Christian singles?

I think that sexual immorality is highly prevalent. It would seem overall that the issue is attended to in the church but mainly in terms of helping men. Where is the help for women? Why does the Christian culture only see this battle as a man’s problem? Why aren’t we asking women to be as accountable, I don’t mean in dress but in their sexual integrity? Calling women to be responsible for their emotional responses to men in their lives. If a man is to be held responsible for a double take shouldn’t a woman be held responsible for lusting after the words of a co-worker? I think because of the lack of knowledge and openness about this struggle for single women we have created a larger shelter to sin in because people don’t acknowledge it as sin and so in return people don’t address the sin.

“Even people who are committed to celibacy are sexual beings. Our sexuality is who we are, and we were made with a body, mind, heart, and spirit, not just a body. Therefore, sexual integrity is not just about physical chastity. It is about purity in all four aspects of our being, body, mind, heart, and spirit”

A few more questions from the book to think on….  seeing as I have not yet dated or courted I don’t have any thoughts on these…. :)

10. In your dating relationships, where have you set the line of sexual integrity? How far is it okay to go prior to marriage? Where does this belief come from?

11. If you ever crossed that imaginary line, were you able to back up and reestablish your previous standards? How did you do it or fail to do it?

12. If you were to allow God to control your mind and desires, what would be the result in regard to your love life? Your relationship with God? Your self-esteem?

Briefly I think that I would be much more focused on serving God. Sharing the gospel with others. While I honestly feel far from ready for marriage at this point in life, I do still have that desire for a relationship whether or not I am ready…. It is hard not to let that desire over play what is most important in my life. While one day should the day come that I get married I want that man to be a godly, god fearing man, but right now, and always really, what is most important is serving God in whatever capacity He allows me to do that in right now. Life works itself in a sense when you focus on God. When I am really giving God that is where it is at. That’s not to say there won’t be trials, good days, difficult days, heartbreak, elation. It just means that you are truly in the midst of God’s will. What a place to be… a place I long to be, yet have such so much growing to do.

**Indicates question from book**
**Indicated recommended scripture reading**